There is nothing better than falling asleep while listening to music. I've been doing it for a while, especially in the mornings when I'm going to school. These songs are my recent favorites:

Cold Water Music-Aim

North West Three-Fatboy Slim

All I Need-Air

Beautiful Crazy-Space Raiders

6 Underground-Sneaker Pimps

Go(Subliminal Mix)-Moby

Elle Et Moi-Cicada

42-Coldplay

Trouble-Coldplay

The Scientist-Coldplay

Belief-John Mayer

love them all. Hope you like them too. Gotta do my physics homework now. Arrivederci!

*you can find most of the songs in Ministry of Sound Presents Chilled II 1991-2009

Idle

I've been completely idle the past few days. My mood continously changed. Even though I wanted to write a new entry each and every day, I couldn't. After writing one or two sentences, my mind got off wandering in utopia. I've been mostly sleepy and grouchy. Instead of surfing the Internet needlessly, I read most of the time and did some of my homeworks.

Most important of all, I did lots and lots of thinking. I thought about everything; I critisized myself, my actions my wants and my thoughts. Honestly, I've looked from an objective perspective. But I'm still not done yet.

Last night I went to a party. It was pure bo-ring. The music sucked. Music is the food of my soul but I felt like I was digesting myself. (sorry if it's too harsh but reality is indeed bitter) If I had known it would be this boring I would have stayed home curled under my favorite blankets and read Jane Austen. Last night would've been a perfect reading night; it was raining and under a cosy blanket I could have had a great quality time.

It's raining outside now, the forecast said that it might be sleety tomorrow. I hope it gets colder and colder cause I really missed snow. I love winter and in the future I want to live somewhere that always snows. The north pole would do, I wanted to see the northern lights all my life. That was just one of the things I thought of the past few days...

Bye for tonight!

*I love photography and if I had a camera I would love to upload photos taken by me. But, unfortunatley, I don't have one. I hope Santa brings me a Nikon D5000. (I won't use the scene features cause I'll be taking pictures manually.)

Who's She?

I've been looking at the mirror ever since I came home, I still am looking. I'm trying to get to know the reflection in the mirror. She doesn't seem like me. She doesn't think like me either. I've been feeling truly peculiar today. Am I falling in love? Definitely not. This is just an obsession that will pas in a few days. It's nothing serious, I hope. This obsession has been growing out on me. I would've never thought I would feel this way someday. This may be just another teenage-syndrome, ergen, day. I hope it is. Last night I had an amazing dream. I know it was just a dream but I loved it. I talked to someone whom I haven't been talking to lately, someone whom I've been kind of ignoring. I always think about the reason why we don't talk to each other and just ignore each other. I HATE it. In my dream I was really ill and I was about to die and he told me that he would do anything to help me survive, it was nice to see that he still cared about me. Wish I could talk to that someone right now... Anyway I thought about that dream all day long and the thought really made me feel this peculiar. I really want to talk to that someone, just a "Hi" is enough...

I just got my glasses today, it fits me nice but I can't recognize myself with glasses. That is another reason I'm still looking at the mirror...

These are not my glasses, of course.

A Delicious Day

Today was absolutely de-li-ci-ous! I did a favor for dad today, I woke up at 9 a.m. His best friends from college were visiting Istanbul and he wanted me to meet them. He was really excited about seeing his friends after a long time. So we woke up at 9 a.m. and went to the Bosphorus for breakfast. We went to a restaurant called Happily Ever After. The meals were absolutely delicious and there was nothing that I couldn't eat of my no-eating-insulin-raising-product diet. I ate scrambled eggs in a croissant with sliced turkey. It was absolutely mouth-watering.

After our perfect breakfast we went to Contemporary Istanbul. Contemporary Istanbul is a modern and contemporary art event. Honestly, I didn't enjoy it as much as I wanted to because after reading the whole brochure I had an headache that could have killed me. After I was done examining the whole exhibitions, I sat down somewhere, closed my eyes and waited for dad and his friends. Even though I did a quick tour and didn't have enough time to examine all of the works carefully, there were 3 artists' work that attracted my attention the most. These were: Zerrin Tekindor, Tuncay Takmaz and Christian Awe. Zerrin Tekindor's paintings were generally about women and I loved the way she drew the eye make-up. I liked how Tuncay Takmaz and Christian Awe used the colors. (apart from the paintings and photographs, my favorite thing about Contemporary Istanbul was the fortune cookies given at the exit). I wish I haven't had that god damn headache... Anyway after that we were supposed to go somewhere and drink some coffee but my headache had gotten worse so dad dropped me to the house. I took a pain killer and... boom! my headache was all gone.

I had gotten pretty hungry by that time so I decided to prepare myself a delicious meal. My grandma had sent tarhana(it's m favorite soup of all time). It was still uncooked so I called grandma and I got the recipe. First I put 3 spoonful or tarhana into a bowl and filled the empty parts with water. While the tarhana was getting softer, I put 1.5 spoonful of tomato paste in to a saucepan and added just a little olive oil (the original recipe says add corn oil but there was no of that left). I turned on the heater so that the olive oil and the tomato paste could mix. While they were mixing, I stirred and mixed the tarhana-water mixture until tarhana became liquid-ish, then added the mixture to the saucepan after sieving it. (I don't like the solid particles in the soup, so I sieve it before I add it to the saucepan.) I also made myself a tasty salad and added my all time favorite sauces while the soup was cooking. First I washed all of the lettuce and the greenery and dried it. I cut them into big pieces(when they are bigger they taste better;)) and put them in to a salad bowl. The other ingredients of my salad were black olives, some little cube shaped cheese and tiny tomatoes. Pomegranate molasses, olive oil and just a little bit of Caesar sauce were the final touches. After I prepared the whole table just for myself I enjoyed my scrumptious meal. It would've been perfect if I hadn't put so much tomato paste in the soup... All in all, this was the most efficient quality time that I had with myself for a long time...

Now I'm going to read a book, after that dad will drop me to mum's and that's how my day will finish. Arrivederci!

by the way, I discovered a super duo: Apple and Ben&Jerry's vanilla. Cut the apple in pieces and put the ice-cream on it. Together they taste heavenly delicious.

Zerrin Tekindor

Wild

I just got back home, dad and I were out to get glasses for me. Now I'm at dad's. I don't have any homework(I actually don't know if I have homework to do or not), how nice. I was looking at my photos on my laptop and I realized that in every single folder there is a starnge shot of me. I picked some for you but don't get me wrong, I don't always look like this :)

Nice

Today was a nice day. Just a nice day. Even though I learned that I'm astigmatic and the pockets under my eyes are purple due to my exhaustion, I feel good. 2 of my friend weren't talking to each other I helped them make up, I went shopping with mom, both of the exams I took today were perfect and I hanged out with my friends downtown. The day was tiring but fun. How nice...

I'm obsessed with the Irish lately. I don't know why. Perhaps it's because they are good-looking and lucky ;)

I'm too tired now and if I keep on talking all I'll say will be a whole bunch of nonsense, bye!

What has happend?

Christmas lights question mark
Originally uploaded by Captain Camera

"I don't want the break to end." was the first thing I told myself when I woke up Tuesday morning(the day school started, unfortunately) at 6.30 a.m. The mid-term break passed quickly, too quickly. Time flies when you're having fun but I was not having fun at all. Studying non-stop for 6 exams is not as fun as you think it is. I've had 4 exams and now there is only 2 to go. My work is paying off actually; all of the exams I took was good. However biology was quite hard but I believe I'll probably get a good grade. Even though studying hard helped me a lot, I'm sick of it. All of my friends are. Exams and homework are the only things we talk about lately, how much everyone wants to sleep is a popular topic as well. I witnessed something really unbelievable today: every single chair and table in the library was occupied by 9th and 10th graders. All of the school had an exam the 8th period and every single student was at the library studying studying and studying. Anyway, on Thursdays we have a double-period math the last 2 periods. In addition to this, the longest school day of the week is Thursday so during math lessons on Thursdays my class blows its stock and everyone goes wild. Today it was even worse. We learned our math exam results and everyone went absolutely insane. Some were happy(like me cause I expected to get 24/100 but I got 60/100 instead, how nice) in contrast some were shocked. Everybody started acting abnormal. Few people were kicked out out the class and most of the people changed their seats more than twice during the lesson. It was pure craziness. At the 10th minute of the second period, our teachers patience overflowed and he declaimed about his discontent about our bad behaviour. I'm glad that's over. It was a loong loong day and it's still not over. Now I have to study chemistry and English, wish me good luck!


"What has happened?"i s our math teachers catch phrase.